I have been able to write again while I was off. I’m working on a new book idea, and so far it’s going well. As much as it started out being an avenue to push my own opinions and beliefs, it has turned into a challenge of my beliefs. I’m not sure where this will lead, but I am sure I will enjoy the trip.

One thing I have worked very hard on this week is tuning out the office. I left the crackberry on the bookcase all week! A friend of mine made a comment to me the other night that really stuck in my mind. “I like you better when you are on vacation.” Wow….what an eye-opener. I know my job sucks and stresses me out, but have I really let it affect those around me? I guess the truthful and uncomfortable answer is YES. So what am I going to do about it?

First, I need to be reminded of that comment every day. I typed her statement, printed it out, and posted it by my desk at home. I need to be reminded of this daily, or I will be drawn back into the ugly mire. I will also take a copy to the office and post it above my desk.

My job is just that, a job. There are going to be decisions made regularly that I don’t agree with, but I have to accept those and move on. I work with some people I do not like or respect, but I have to accept that and do my job as best as I can, and not be distracted by my own judgments of others. I need to learn to turn my work off when I leave the office. My evenings and weekends should be the time I enjoy being myself, not trying to unwind from the office.

I have given away too much of my life to the office. It was a choice I made, although I don’t recall making it. The stress is not good for my health, my life, or my relationships. My free time needs to be filled with my life, my family, my friends, and my goals.

So today I vow to let go of the work stress, and become a better me, in more control of my life. I will also work harder to be a better partner, a better parent, and a better friend. I don’t think it will be as easy as it sounds at first, but I will make it happen.

Thank you Leah for being honest with me….I needed it. Hugs!

The wave pool is awesome, and the more people that are in, the better it is. One word of caution though, it will make you tired if you spend a lot of time in it. You don’t realize while you are in it how much of a work out it is. After you get home, your thighs will feel like you’ve been working out at the gym. And if you have a bad knee like I do, you might want to take it easy the first time. But playing in the wave pool beats going to the gym any day. Be sure to tighten those swimming trunks….the wave can take away much more than your float.

The lazy river is just that – lazy and relaxing. We floated around the course several times. It was more fun when the park first opened this year though. When the season started, you had to be on a float to be in the lazy river. They don’t enforce that rule now. There are people walking the course. Why?? And there are many kids playing with floats, swimming and running and playing under the waterfalls. I enjoyed the attraction much more when I didn’t have to worry about floating over the top of somebody’s kid. There is a huge kiddie pool available, so I don’t know why so many parents are taking their kids to the lazy river to play.

There are two things I don’t enjoy about Nashville Shores. First, their food and drink prices are outrageous. They don’t allow you to bring in coolers, so they have a captive audience and can charge whatever they want. Although we didn’t today, we usually bring a cooler and leave it in the car. You can leave the park and get back in, so it’s much cheaper to bring your lunch in a cooler, and eat in the car.

The second thing I don’t like is having to pay for the good floats. They have a few available at the attractions, but not near enough, and I’m sure they know that. You can pay to rent a float, but you need to hold on to it. We had our float stolen off our chairs one time, and noticed that happening several times today. Someone tried to steal the floats from the couple sitting in front of us three times today. Floats should be included in the admission price. But more importantly, people shouldn’t steal. It’s a real shame you can’t go get a drink without having to carry your float around with you. We finally learned today to tie ours to the chair with our towels. I think next time we will bring the bicycle locks.

“I believe it takes special gifts and graces to join one of our armed forces and serve our Country. I believe that God chose those individuals and equipped them with those gifts. I today thank God for those He chose and for those that accepted His call. I appreciate all you’ve done and all the sacrifices you have made for me, my family and this country. Well done good and faithful servants! God Bless!”

I know this poster meant well, but I don’t think all the men and women who serve in the armed forces would agree with her way of thinking. First of all, not all soldiers are christian, and we have to recognize and accept that fact. I find this post to be a bit offensive, albeit unintentionally, because it takes away the free will and courage of our soldiers, and their desire to serve this country.

These men and women made a choice to serve our country. They put aside some of their own freedoms, left their family and friends behind, put some of their careers on hold, to make a commitment to our country and those living in it. Neither I, the original poster, nor anyone else has the right to take that choice away from them. I’m sure god is proud of them what they have done, but I don’t believe he molded and guided them to do it.

Especially on this Memorial Day, the men and women of our armed forces deserve our respect and gratitude. They do not deserve to have that taken away from them, and given to someone’s impression of their god. They deserve ALL the gratitude and credit for the choice they made.

Thank you, all men and women, serving in the armed forces to protect my country and my freedoms. May you receive all the respect you deserve today, and every day. May your god be proud of you for wonderful person you are.

I took the first pill today, so if I follow the plan, I will quit smoking in one week. I have to admit I’m a bit nervous about taking it. There were several side affects listed in the brochure, and I’ve seen a few commercials from law firms about the drug. I’m going to take the chance though. I can survive 12 weeks of weird dreams for the benefit of quitting smoking, as long as I don’t the anger or suicidal side affects.

My intent is to blog my way thought my stop smoking progress. Writing this blog is my public announcement of my commit to quit. Physically going to the doctor and the pharmacy was part of that commitment too. I have to put forth the effort on this journey, or I will never succeed.

Wish me luck!!!!

I am really tempted to purchase this movie on DVD so I can watch it often. I want to keep this idea fresh on my mind, and fall back into my bad ways of eating. I definitely do not want to go back to eating meat that came from industrial food farms. The scenes of baby chicks being hatched in a drawer so full they couldn’t move, and then being poured down a chute to a conveyor belt and having their heads painted for branding just made me want to run outside and pet my own chickens. I had no idea that the life cycle of these chickens is only 49 days! These chickens are fed so many steroids and growth hormones that they grow into full size adults in only 49 days after hatching. As adults they look unnatural with huge breasts and tiny legs that can’t even hold them up. The cows and pigs weren’t treated any better. They just stood around in the own waste and disease waiting to die so a million people could have a roast for dinner tonight. Even as I type this, my stomach is getting upset again.

I’ve talked before about becoming a vegetarian. I never put any real effort into changing, but for a while I did add a lot more vegetables to my diet, and tried some new things. As usual, I changed back to my lazy comfortable ways over time, and haven’t been eating as well lately. I guess those days are over now. I went to the grocery after work yesterday and bought a shopping basket full of fresh vegetables and other vegetarian goodies. For now I am a vegetarian, unless I can find a local farmer that sells meat and I can be sure they are free range, fed proper foods with steroids or antibiotics, and are treated like living beings during their life cycle.

Greg closed the store early yesterday, and got home about the same time that I did. He took me out to dinner, and bought me a wonderful back drop for my coming photography business. It’s one of the great portable drops with a carry bag, and included white and black backgrounds. So now I have my camera, lenses, spot lighting, umbrella lighting, and the back drops. I am ready to be a studio photographer! I had Greg ask Jan this week about using the yoga studio to practice and she said yes. That’s a perfect room for me to set up my equipment and play with lighting and all the different settings on my camera. She also suggested that I offer to take yoga portraits of the students. What an awesome idea! A little more practice time, and I will do just that.

Now back to my birthday. I received many birthday wishes on facebook, by email, and by texts. Recently I’ve been pondering why I don’t have many friends, and even asked Spirit to help me with this. Yesterday he showed me that I do have many friends, I just haven’t taken the time to notice and appreciate them. I put a post on facebook last night thanking everyone for the warm wishes and being blessed for having such great friends. I need to remember this everyday, just not on my birthday, to be thankful for the friends in my life, and show them that I care.

So, happy birthday to me, and thank you to Spirit for a great life!

STOP SMOKING: Already covered in a previous post, but still very important. I haven’t set a quit date yet. If this freaking arctic blast doesn’t leave Nashville, it will be very soon. I’m tired of standing outside in 20 degree weather to smoke.

REIKI MASTER: Over the next week I intend to complete my Master Training and schedule the attunement for soon thereafter. As soon as I finish the attunement, I will start developing a training program so I can teach and attune other students. I want to take Reiki to a new level in this area. I will be working on ways to publicize the service and the training. I want to offer services at the store, at my home, and maybe out calls, just so I can reach more people.

REFLEXOLOGIST: I want to have this training finished and the exams completed by the end of January. Allowing time for filing the paperwork with the state to be licensed, I hope to be able to start offering sessions by mid-February, or at least the end of February. Like Reiki, I want to offer services at the store, at my home, and maybe out calls.

YOGA: I’m going to give yoga a try this year. I plan to start with the beginners class tomorrow evening. Practicing yoga is part of my commitment to myself to take care of my body and my spirit.

EAT BETTER: I am such a picky eater! I intend to try many new dishes this year. I have prepared a couple of dishes the past few days that are totally new to me, and I enjoyed them both. I will be blogging about those separately, and hopefully will provide pictures of some of the dishes.

WORKING OUT: I have already started the year off better than last year ended. I need to develop a regular routine for working out. I’m going to start off slow, and let my body adjust and work up to more vigorous routines. I did not like working with a personal trainer last year. He pushed too hard, and I would leave the gym in pain and barely breathing. Many mornings I woke up so sore I could hardly get out of bed or get dressed. I just don’t see how that can be good for your body.

MEDITATE: OK, so I’m not very good at meditating. My mind wanders all over the place when I’m supposed to be still and quiet. The Buddhist books I’ve been reading say to meditate twice a day, at least 10 minutes at a time. Surely I can find two 10-minutes slots in my day to practice regularly.

SPIRITUALITY: The more I read and contemplate about life and what I believe to be truth, the more I’m convinced that Buddhism is the correct road for me. I’ve read several books on Buddhism the past couple of years, and it all seems so natural and true for me. I have an altar upstairs, but I neglect it and rarely use it for meditation. I move it around every time I feel like it’s in my way. This year I will formalize my altar, make it a place of peace and meditation.

WORK: I start a new job tomorrow, in the same office. There has been a re-organization of duties, and I’m taking on a new role. I hope this removes some of the stress I’ve been under the past couple of years, or four years actually. This year I will not allow my job to take over my life. It’s a job, a role that I play 40 hours per week, a function for my employer, and that’s all it will be. It’s not who I am, does not feed me spirituality, and I will no longer allow it to be my life.

WRITING: So Spirit keeps telling me I’m a writer. At no other time in my life have I felt that, but it does seem true. I have so many things to say, and writing seems the most logical way to release them. So for this year, I will blog often, write stories for our business blog, at least start working on the two books I want to write, and maybe try to write and submit some short stories.

PHOTOGRAPHY: Grossly neglected this past year! I call myself an amateur photographer, but I don’t know if I’m even that advanced yet. I need to start taking picture again, and develop my eye. I would love to submit some freelance pics by the end of this year, and maybe be able to do some portrait shots.

Seems like a lot for one year, but these are all the things I want to do, so it shouldn’t be a chore or stress to accomplish them. I need to get more focused to achieve these goals, and should probably develop a schedule to work on them. I do better with a plan and a schedule.

Let’s start with the most obvious path to a better me: stop smoking. In this ignored resolution of new years past, I always blamed my failure to quit smoking on lack of will power, stress from work, stress from life, or because the wind was blowing from the north. But this year is different, because quitting smoking is not a resolution to be achieved on it’s own. Quit smoking is only one small step in creating a better me. In past years I haven’t been ready to quit, but there are several reasons why I am ready now.

First, it’s become simply a habit, and not something enjoyable. There used to be this great feeling of having that desperately needed cigarette. I don’t experience that anymore. I can’t think of one cigarette I’ve had in the past few weeks that I really enjoyed. The thrill is gone.

Second, I’ve come to realize lately how nasty cigarettes are. Maybe it’s the cold damp weather of late, but I can smell the smoke so much more than I used to. I can smell it in my clothes, on my skin, in my car. My car smells like an ashtray! Thank goodness we don’t smoke in the house. I can smell it strongly on my hands, which is driving me nuts. The past few weeks I’ve been washing my hands a lot, just to remove the smell. No doubt if I can smell it on my clothes and skin, then everyone I come in contact with can smell it too.

Third, it’s a hassle. It takes extra effort to smoke these days. I can’t leave the house without making sure I have my cigarettes and a way to light them, and a way to carry them. I can’t enjoy a nice meal or social gathering out without making sure I go some place where I can slip out and smoke. Of course that has become almost embarrassing in this day when smoking is taboo. And don’t get me wrong, I’m glad smoking has become taboo. I commented to Greg recently that I wish smoking would be globally banned. Let’s make everyone stop smoking at one time, deal with a month of bad attitudes, and be done with it.

And fourth, and probably the most important, smoking doesn’t suit me anymore. It doesn’t fit the persona I’ve been working to create for myself. Although I may not be there yet, I enjoy seeing myself as an eclectic, artsy, spiritual soul. Can you be that person smelling like an cigarette all the time? Can I promote my belief in living a spiritual life, the healing energy of Spirit, the beauty of aromatherapy, the desire for a greener and more natural life, all while puffing on a cigarette? I think not.

So there you have it. These are the reasons that I will quit smoking this year. I haven’t set a ‘quit date’ yet. It could be tomorrow or a month from now, but I know it’s coming. The great thing is that quitting smoking this time is part of the natural order of things. Luckily I don’t have to be in the driver’s seat this time, I just have to let go of the fear, and allow things to happen as they should.

All as it should be….

If you need a good chiropractor, go see Dr. Chris May and tell him Roy sent you.